Helpless

[bigyetiman]

Have you ever felt totally helpless when every instinct is telling you to do something ?

Day off yesterday so we went out really early still dark, OH for a run, I opted for walking. She went down the road then I saw her stop look upwards, out came the phone and she made a call, then started waving frantically and pointing at the farmhouse opposite her. It was on fire, smoke pouring out from under the eaves and flames from the back. You just know you should try and get in, but it's too dangerous, fire brigade arrived within 5 minutes, but the owner who we know was dead when they got to him. The firefighters were good telling us we could have met the same fate if we had tried to do something, don't make it any easier though

 

[MrsBiscuit]

OMG, BYM, I am so so sorry. What an awful thing to have happened to the poor man. I know its natural to blame yourself if you think you could/should have done something, but I hope once the shock has worn off you will be able to know you did all you could and nothing more could be expected of you. I hope you and MrsBYM are feeling as well as you could after such a horrible experience.

 

[dinosaw]

It must have been very traumatic BYM, but rest assured that you did absolutely the right thing. Not just your own life you would have put on the line, but that of the firefighters too, had they needed to go in and rescue you. You tend to find in these situations that your senses make the right decision for you, even if you question it afterwards.

 

[bigyetiman]

We know the rules, get out and stay out. We have a godson who is a firefighter and he says they deal with more injuries from people going back into a building to rescue something valuable, plus as OH said if we could have smashed the double glazing you just add a rush of oxygen to the flames.
Things like this are always left to the professionals.
It is just the human response isn't it to try to help. OH has taken it well really, but I do think women tend to deal with these things better.

 

[Margaid]

Thinking of you both.

Double glazing is very hard to break and OH is right about the inrush of oxygen. One serious problem is the amount of household items that give off toxic fumes which, if they don't kill you, can cause permanent damage and disability. If the fire had taken such a hold by the time you spotted it your neighbour was sadly probably already dead. So pleased that you're still with us.

 

[Tweetypie]

That's so, so, tragic. What a horrible experience to see. I can imagine that will stay with you for some time, but nothing you could have done, it would have already been too late. :-(

 

[Marigold]

I’m really sorry you had to go through this horrible experience.
But don’t feel helpless - you were the people who noticed, and called for help. In an isolated country area, if it hadn’t been for your presence of mind, no help would have been attempted. I think you and your wife were very brave - not everyone would have got involved, or even noticed what was happening. Well done.

 

[rick]

A awful thing to witness. Being there was absolutely all you could have done - and did.

 

[Hen-Gen]

Truly grim bym. Thinking of you both.

 

[bigyetiman]

Thanks one and all. OH said after she phoned " if anyone is in there they will be dead from smoke". The gentleman's daughter came down and thanked us for phoning as it meant the majority of the house could be saved and she has managed to retrieve the family photo's from downstairs which was relatively unscathed. The fire brigade did tell her that he would have been dead from the fumes before the call was made.
His wife was in hospital for a minor op and they decided to keep her in overnight, so she had a lucky escape

 

[Marigold]

Poor woman. What a homecoming.
Any idea what started it?

 

[bigyetiman]

Not heard officially, but the rumour mill is working well, as it was after the fire. You know the type of thing "two men in a car stopped and phoned, broke in rescued the dog (which they don't have) they would have gone upstairs but it collapsed etc.
it is the second fire we have seen locally, the other was sheer stupidity. Couple of summers ago, at the nearby stables during a heatwave they decided to burn some rubbish, and it went up like a skyrocket and ran along the dry grass, to a stable. Luckily virtually all the horses were out apart from 3 and a donkey. OH saw the smoke and smelled it ran down there, and the girls and the couple opposite were just standing there. She said have you rung the fire brigade, no was the answer.
She ended up with another lady, Karen from further along getting the animals and taking them down the road to ours. plus telling them to start hosing down the other stables to prevent an absolute inferno.
One thing about my OH she is the person for a crisis. She does think on her feet, as did Karen who started hosing down hedges before our houses went up.

 

[LadyA]

Dreadful experience for you both, bym. Hope you are both ok.

 

[Marigold]

I wondered if it would have happened if his wife had been home as usual to see that everything was done right. He must have been under some stress, on his own with no support, maybe worried about her, and many men wouldn’t have known about switching things off in the kitchen, or would have taken the chance to smoke in bed etc. I’m not saying that was that happened but it’s a possibility.